All My Soup, Part II

A while back, I posted some lyrics I made up to go with the song Auld Lang Syne. For some reason, this popped back into my head the other day, and I added a new verse.

Here's the whole thing so far...

I have a way of eating soup
that offends the nicest folks.
They don't like it when I suck it
through the nostrils of my nose.

My wife is embarrassed by me
whenever we eat out.
She hates it when I'm sitting there
stuffing noodles in my snout.

My friends they all say I need help,
they just make fun of me.
But I just smile and I say,
"have you tried Chef Boyardee?"

Oh, I've got to find some balance in my life.