Gore vs. Bush

Supreme Court Strips Al Gore of Oscar; Declares George W. Bush Winner

Fresh off his Oscar victory last night for Best Documentary, Al Gore has been stripped of his title by the U.S. Supreme Court. George W. Bush was declared the new winner despite the fact that he had not received a single vote or even watched a movie in the last decade except for Mel Gibson's The Passion of the Christ.

In the Court's opinion, new Chief Justice John Roberts wrote that he was proud to follow in the steps of his old boss and predecessor, the late William Rehnquist, who helped decide Bush v. Gore in 2000. "You've gotta love lifetime appointments," Roberts said. "We aren't even trying anymore!"

Insiders say a disappointed Gore has already begun regrowing his beard, although a spokesperson claims it is only so he can save energy on heat now that climate change has made the winter months colder and more unpredictable.

Meanwhile, jubilation abounded in Crawford, Texas, where George W. Bush was leisurely enjoying a few weeks off from his normal vacation spot in Camp David. "I didn't even know you could win an Oscar for pretending to be something in real life," Bush said. He also issued an executive order demanding that Martin Scorsese's long-awaited award for Best Director be given to Dick Cheney for his handling over the White House.

Plans to melt the statue down into gold coins bearing Bush's likeness were scrapped after Bush decided it had been involved in terrorist activities. The statue is expected to arrive in Guantanamo by tomorrow morning, where it will no longer be under the jurisdiction of Roberts and the Supreme Court.

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Ding Ding Ding!

It's official: the land is ours!



Escrow closed on Thursday. We've got our hands full planning our next steps, which is why I have been so absent.

While I Was Away

I haven't been posing any content to my own blog, so I may as well post stuff from other blogs. I thought this was interesting.

Some Days Are Just That Way

What a shitty day.

Last night, our cat got out when my wife went out get something out of her car. I was feeling under the weather and it was raining, so we figured she wouldn't go far. She's gotten out before. She was last seen this morning by a neighbor around 8:00 in the morning, arguing with another cat - we forgot to let her back in before going to bed last night!

Now she's missing. I went to look for her around the back of the apartments and tried to step down on a fallen fence siding, and discovered the hard way that it was covered with wet moss. I went down hard and now, many hours later, my back and neck are killing me. And the cat is still missing.

Then my wife and I had an argument about something stupid, and she started having the pain in her gut that she sometimes gets and the doctors can't identify. This just added to her lingering disgust over the way Google treated her in a job interview last week (morons!). The only good news I got today was that our loan for the land has been approved.

It's still raining. I'm still not feeling well, and I'm in increasing pain. All I want to hear is a meow at the door, and then the day won't seem quite so bad. But I wonder if I'll even bother to get out of bed tomorrow.

UPDATE: The cat returned around 11:00 pm. I took some ibuprophen and went to bed soon thereafter.

What's He Up To Now?

The Big B. is up to something... -- http://www.tvweek.com/news.cms?newsId=11508

Is it fair OR balanced? Maybe he doesn't like that. -- http://www.cpb.org/aboutcpb/goals/objectivity/

Kind of makes you wonder, doesn't it? -- http://mediacitizen.blogspot.com/2005/11/tomlinson-slinks-away.html

What are you up to, Big B.? What do you want to cut us off from this time?